Tuesday, January 02, 2007

New Year's Update

AUTHOR'S NOTE: This post was written when I was a little intoxicated on New Years Eve, and therefore I didn't publish it. However, upon further thought I figure that's not the right thing to do. It's like trying to pretend you didn't say something when all your friends were there to witness it. Therefore, in the pursuit of honestly representing myself, I figure I might as well go ahead and share the stupid moments as well as the more... literarily composed ones. So, without further ado, this was the post I started new years eve at Tom's table in Atlantic Beach.

Well, it's 9:58 PM and this is your new years scooby update. I can officially say that I'm almost drunk, which is WAY strange for me, considering I have the tolarance of three ox's and never ever drink. As usual, this is why I don't think... umm.. drink.  I've only been drinking for about 20 minutes, but I've tossed back half a fifth in about three minutes and I'm enjoying the effects of the buzz, which will disappate soon. Do you have any idea how dyslexic you become when you've been drinking? I have to hit the backspace key about every three characters, and that's only assumig that I can find th ebackspace key...

Now I remember why I don't drink. I was drinking for about ten minute before I said something that hurt April's feelings, which I immediately regretted. Again, to be bluntly honest, I think I'm too much of a control freak to be an alcoholic. I don't drink much because it makes turns off that filter that I use that tells me when.. no what.. yeah.. what NOt to say. Carp. I keep kitting the backspace key not by accident.

I think I'm gonna jus twrite this as it comes to me and forget the punctuation, because when you think about it what is punctuation really? It's like commands fr preople who can't read... ymm understand what you're trying to say. I mean if you really new what I menat you would n't need the punctiation right"?

I started off about twent minutes ago because tom kept hyelling tha tno one now was drinking with him. So, I decided to drink wth him and now that I'm drunk he's watching som emovie and I have to shuch... shuch..carp... shuch... crap.. shush!

Ha i said it!

Ok.. umm.. what else can I say? I have absolutely no tihng to pontificate on at this moment. I'm just tryin gto blog so Tom can finish his sutpid movoie. Besides, I've seen it anyways and I't s a horrible bomoivie.

Oh god I have drunk typing skillls. How crappy is that. I feel like those fgriends that I hate when they're drunk. You see? This is why I dn't drionk.  Cause I get all happy .. like way TOOOOO happy.. I becme that thappy guy that people hate... see? I shouldn't drink at all.

i probbaly shouldn' tpost thins because it would only refect bacly on my.. me.  Shit.

My momma wouldn' tbe too prod o fme at the moment I think. Crap. Mpmmpa, if ou're readyin this, I love you and happy new years. I promose I don't do thois often.


Hly corap i I cab;t dind the mouse. This really siucks. I statterted with my lips bein gmunb. Now, my feet arre numb. I'm snot sture show... how that relates but I'm sure that I f my feet are numb, it'w way worse than my house.. no .. m y mouth meing bumb.

I really can't type when I'm drnuyk. I kind of thought ath T since I tuped so much that my findgers soulc still find the keys. However, I have found that this is not true necessarilyl. For ecample of you find the d key in the frong place, alll the keys seem to be one place to the right.. or left... or below.. you get the idea.


  1. That is beautiful!!! I love it. LMAO... Where are you today anyway? I'm glad you waited to make the decision whether to post or not when you could make a rational choice. Many times people make choices when they do not have a clear mind and the consequences come sober or drunk! You were not a bad drunk. You were hilarious and it was something that we'll remember for a long time. No one was hurt, nothing was damaged, the guns were hidden! That movie did suck by the way. I think all that negativity in the movie only took away from our good time.

    As the song we were singing says "Be Young, Be Foolish, Be Happy!"

    Thanks for the great moment. You're never guaranteed the next moment so you have to enjoy each minute. Thanks again for the moment. Love to all....

  2. Punctuation is for Creative writing majors who end up teaching special ed. (Oooh, I DID type that.)

    Punctuation is NOT part of Ding-speak.

    Funny, I actually speak better than I write. Maybe thats why I never got that Phd.

    Thanks for posting. It took my mind off stuff.


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